Someone has been impersonating CEO Sasha Chen, sending increasingly absurd company-wide decrees from her email account. The latest went to investors. Five suspects. Thirty minutes. Find the culprit.
Email them directly to interrogate. They will respond.
Five emails sent from Sasha's account over 72 hours. Each more absurd than the last.
"Effective Monday: all office plants are to be addressed by name. The fern in reception is now Boudicca. The pothos by the kitchen is Dave. The succulent on my desk is My Lord Byron. Please greet them on arrival. I will be checking."
"After a four-hour breathwork session and a vivid encounter with my future self, I have decided that all Clack employees will observe a global shared bedtime of 21:30 GMT. New York: this means 16:30 your time. Sleep is alignment. Alignment is velocity."
"We are pivoting. With immediate effect, Clack will sunset its enterprise SaaS product line and redirect engineering resources toward 'Clack Mares' — a luxury subscription pony service for high-net-worth individuals. James, update the deck. Magnus, learn pony husbandry. Toby, vibes."
"Tuesdays are now Lobster Tuesdays. Dress code: red, salmon, or butter. Greeting protocol: 'good claws to you.' Behavioural note: walk sideways where geometrically possible. This is non-negotiable and was, in retrospect, prophesied at last year's birthday gathering."
"It is my absolute joy to announce that Clack has, as of 02:14 this morning, acquired Plas Glyn — a 16th-century manor house in Snowdonia. The property will function as our HQ, retreat, and (Q4 stretch goal) wellness venue. Investors and the chairman will receive financing details by Friday."